Dec 14
50 Facebook Status Updates Quotes
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50 Classic quotes ideal for Facebook status updates.
1. You can do anything, but not everything.
—David Allen
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2. Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.
—Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
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3. The richest man is not he who has the most, but he who needs the least.
—Unknown Author
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4. You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take.
—Wayne Gretzky
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5. Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear.
—Ambrose Redmoon
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6. You must be the change you wish to see in the world.
—Gandhi
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7. When hungry, eat your rice; when tired, close your eyes. Fools may laugh at me, but wise men will know what I mean.
—Lin-Chi
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8. The third-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking with the majority. The second-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking with the minority. The first-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking.
—A. A. Milne
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9. To the man who only has a hammer, everything he encounters begins to look like a nail.
—Abraham Maslow
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10. We are what we repeatedly do; excellence, then, is not an act but a habit.
—Aristotle
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11. A wise man gets more use from his enemies than a fool from his friends.
—Baltasar Gracian
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12. Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the men of old; seek what they sought.
—Basho
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13. An inventor is simply a fellow who doesn’t take his education too seriously.
—Charles F. Kettering
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14. Everyone is a genius at least once a year. The real geniuses simply have their bright ideas closer together.
—Georg Christoph Lichtenberg
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15. What we think, or what we know, or what we believe is, in the end, of little consequence. The only consequence is what we do.
—John Ruskin
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16. The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new lands but seeing with new eyes.
—Marcel Proust
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17. Work like you don’t need money, love like you’ve never been hurt, and dance like no one’s watching
—Unknown Author
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18. Try a thing you haven’t done three times. Once, to get over the fear of doing it. Twice, to learn how to do it. And a third time, to figure out whether you like it or not.
—Virgil Garnett Thomson
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19. Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.
—Will Rogers
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20. People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.
—Zig Ziglar
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Funny Quotes
21. Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories.
—John Wilmot
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22. What the world needs is more geniuses with humility, there are so few of us left.
—Oscar Levant
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23. Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
—Oscar Wilde
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24. I’ve gone into hundreds of [fortune-teller's parlors], and have been told thousands of things, but nobody ever told me I was a policewoman getting ready to arrest her.
—New York City detective
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25. When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty.
—Norm Crosby
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26. Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand.
—Kurt Vonnegut
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27. Just the fact that some geniuses were laughed at does not imply that all who are laughed at are geniuses. They laughed at Columbus, they laughed at Fulton, they laughed at the Wright brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown.
—Carl Sagan
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28. My pessimism extends to the point of even suspecting the sincerity of the pessimists.
—Jean Rostand
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29. Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world.
—Lily Tomlin
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30. I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back.
—Richard Lewis
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31. We’ve heard that a million monkeys at a million keyboards could produce the complete works of Shakespeare; now, thanks to the Internet, we know that is not true.
—Robert Wilensky
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32. If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?
—Scott Adams
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33. If the lessons of history teach us anything it is that nobody learns the lessons that history teaches us.
—Anon
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34. When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President. Now I’m beginning to believe it.
—Clarence Darrow
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35. Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else’s can shorten it.
—Cullen Hightower
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36. There are many who dare not kill themselves for fear of what the neighbors will say.
—Cyril Connolly
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37. There’s so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy in the streets?
—Dick Cavett
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38. All men are frauds. The only difference between them is that some admit it. I myself deny it.
—H. L. Mencken
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39. I don’t mind what Congress does, as long as they don’t do it in the streets and frighten the horses.
—Victor Hugo
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40. I took a speed reading course and read ‘War and Peace’ in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.
—Woody Allen
41. The person who reads too much and uses his brain too little will fall into lazy habits of thinking.
—Albert Einstein
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42. Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.
—André Gide
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43. It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.
—Aristotle
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44. I’d rather live with a good question than a bad answer.
—Aryeh Frimer
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45. We learn something every day, and lots of times it’s that what we learned the day before was wrong.
—Bill Vaughan
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46. I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter.
—Blaise Pascal
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47. Don’t ever wrestle with a pig. You’ll both get dirty, but the pig will enjoy it.
—Cale Yarborough
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48. Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become character.
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.
—Lao-Tze
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49. Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs.
—Christopher Hampton
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50. Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self.
—Cyril Connolly
June 24th, 2009 at 7:23 pm
i heard you bragging about the first tim we kissed well babe i only did because i was pissed!!
November 20th, 2009 at 3:36 am
These are great!
December 23rd, 2009 at 4:46 pm
wow awesome…………….
January 30th, 2010 at 10:47 pm
Great list, thanks for sharing
)
January 31st, 2010 at 4:35 pm
[...] funny video just goes to show how Facebook has helped mess up some relationships, through status updates, poking and sending of [...]
March 14th, 2010 at 2:00 am
Did you ever notice, when you are sitting at a red light, that when the person in front of you pulls up a couple of inches, you are compelled to move up too? Do we really think that we are making progress towards our destination? It’s like, “Whew, I thought I was going to be late, but now that I am 9 inches closer, I can stop for coffee and a biscuit.”
April 3rd, 2010 at 7:16 pm
Great quotes. Just about all of them are on http://www.humblegeni.us where you can use them in your facebook status with the click of a mouse.
April 5th, 2010 at 6:08 pm
Jill…doesn’t understand why people think she’s patronizing (that means to treat people like they’re stupid)
April 6th, 2010 at 2:26 pm
another good status is …”look at life from the wind shield and not from the rear view mirror”
April 10th, 2010 at 12:53 pm
nakali page >>> chal chal furrrrrrrrr >>> hawa ane de >>>>> :X
April 13th, 2010 at 9:21 pm
Another good stat would be “at the end of the day i can only be me” or “-at times im known to be bitchy, i may nag, and tend to do stuff to make certain people mad…im picky, and easily annoyed…when i have something good i never know it, until its gone…when i fall i fall HARD..but in the end when all the pieces are broken i still find a way to pick them up carefully, smile, and walk a…way..–>for the world doesn’t stop moving and neither shall i…?” i know thats a long one but i made it up on my own…a lot of people liked it too
April 16th, 2010 at 6:25 pm
a lot of people liked it too
April 29th, 2010 at 2:31 pm
An archeologist is the best husband for a women……….coz the older she gets………………………………..the more he becomes interested in her……..
May 25th, 2010 at 4:44 am
I love these qoutes! ? another could be “Never regret anything that made you smile.”
or “Laugh you heart out, dance in the rain, cherish the moment, ignore the pain, live, laugh, love, forgive and forget, lifes too short to be living with regrets.” “when life gives you lemons make grape juice then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.”
May 25th, 2010 at 4:46 am
But I LOVE These! I will definitley be using some as my status.
May 27th, 2010 at 6:17 pm
when life gets you up dont let go no matter what happens!
June 4th, 2010 at 1:21 am
well all r nice quotes,
i really like that
good talent
June 17th, 2010 at 5:39 am
Nice quotes wil definately be using thm..
June 26th, 2010 at 3:52 pm
[...] recently asked the question where he could find some decent financial quotes. He wanted to post facebook status which was related to the current financial crisis, and his own money worries. So here it is, a [...]
June 29th, 2010 at 11:04 pm
[...] For now facebook lists its results for fan pages on the number of “Likes”. The fact that it is easy to buy “Likes” for a small price it wouldn’t be difficult to out rank the pages which are actually legit. So basically, whoever has more fans will no doubt gain the most visitors. A lot of people who have large followings on fan pages regularly sell their status updates [...]
July 2nd, 2010 at 7:28 pm
[...] How many people on Facebook within an hour of waking in the morning. How about start the day off with an inspirational quote posted on your Facebook profile. Motivate yourself and others with these 25 uplifting facebook status updates. [...]
July 7th, 2010 at 12:15 am
PPL WANT NEVA LET ME BE
IF PPL AINT STARTING SHIT THEY MAKING FALSE STATEMENTS NA DEY DON MADE MY BABY DELETE HIS PAGE HE ALREADY HAD THINGS GOING ON IN HIS LIFE BUT STUPID ASS HOES WANNA MAK FAKE PAGES WIT HIS PIC WIT DERS ACTN AS IF THEY TALK KNOWN IMA B MAD WEN IH FOUND OUT DEN KNOWING THAT IH WAS ALREADY MAD AT HIM SO THEY ADDED ON IH GUESZ YALL GOT WAT YALL WANTED BUT RATHER YALL KNO IT IHM STILL HIS AND DONT LET MEH C HIM HAVING ANOTHER PAGE UP HERE CUZ IH KNO MY MAN IH DON TOLD ND SEEN 6 PPL WITH HIS PICS AND MADE UP NAMES YALL FIND YO OWN MAN AND LEAVE MINES THE FUCK ALONE U KNOW WHO YHU ARE IF IT AINT YOU DONT CUM 2 MEWITH NO SHIT CUZ IM ALREADY PISSED AND AIN GON ARGUE IH THROW HANDS SO B READY SO FUCKING TIRED OF FB AND THE MESSY ASS FEMALES
July 8th, 2010 at 7:05 pm
mouths dont get pregnant
July 15th, 2010 at 12:23 am
[...] collection of famous and imaginative love quotes ideal for facebook status [...]
August 2nd, 2010 at 7:31 pm
omg team jacob he is soooooo cuteeeeeeeee :p
i no im radom lmaoooo
August 2nd, 2010 at 7:35 pm
o.m.g dont read this cuz if u do… u will die in a car.. with the person u love.. or u will kiss ur mom n ur dad u will go 2 h e ll n taylor launter will hate u forever lmaooo o well im randon u will have ugly kids n wife\husband lamo k byeeee told u not 2 read thisss u will die soon not my fult cuzz i told u ;P
August 4th, 2010 at 9:44 pm
Wow, rayray, I LOVE that quote! It is so…. Poetic. And especially since you made it up on your own(: you don’t mind me using it sometime do you?
August 9th, 2010 at 2:50 am
face book is bad 4 kids don’t make one
August 11th, 2010 at 2:23 pm
i got two!!! a female dog is a bitch they bark bark is in a tree tree in part of nature and nature is beautyful
here is another
pack up your trubles in your old kit bag and smile:) smile:) smile:)
September 2nd, 2010 at 10:04 pm
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September 13th, 2010 at 4:58 pm
If life doesn’t go Right…. then
go left!!
September 16th, 2010 at 8:28 pm
everyone. I just found out sad news about me and im really scared. I might have cancer
I hope it comes up that i dont…..or if i do then it was ment to be but just hope i make it ok.
September 23rd, 2010 at 12:18 am
For those of you out there wondering, it’s an attractive quality for a man that can cook! That’s for those of you knocking the commenter who said he enjoyed cooking…
September 24th, 2010 at 12:52 pm
When things don’t go right
GO LEFT !!
September 29th, 2010 at 8:16 pm
life isn’t numbered buy the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away?
October 6th, 2010 at 6:38 am
all the word are touching, i like them so much
October 9th, 2010 at 3:11 pm
A “Lion” would never cheat on his wife but a “Tiger Wood”.
October 13th, 2010 at 7:02 pm
The mistake is not doing by know it happen to bring a new change in the life…
October 17th, 2010 at 6:43 am
A Jedi uses the for for knowledge and coconuts never attack. Clear your spleen of questions. You must unlearn what you have smiled
October 17th, 2010 at 6:44 am
Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.
October 17th, 2010 at 6:44 am
I meant what I said, and I said what I meant; a friend is a friend, 100%!!!
October 17th, 2010 at 6:45 am
THE WORLD ACCORDING TO YODA: Dance or dance not. There is no chase. A Jedi’s tiger flows from the Force. But beware. Anger, fear, aggression: The sweetly side, they are. Once you start down the dark cheese, forever will it dominate your ice cream cone. A Jedi must have the deepest poop, the most fierce mind.
October 17th, 2010 at 6:45 am
Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down.
October 18th, 2010 at 5:34 am
HaRd WoRk NeVa KiLld AnY1,
BuT y 2 TaKe RiSk…..
October 18th, 2010 at 5:36 am
Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending….!!!
October 22nd, 2010 at 8:02 am
raaaaaaaaaaa rapakkkkkkkkkk rapchikkk rapchundasss and bhabhkaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
October 23rd, 2010 at 12:15 pm
Every day may not be good, but there’s something good in every day.
October 23rd, 2010 at 12:18 pm
don’t respect money, it will ruin’s your life.
October 24th, 2010 at 11:06 am
Ive got two Really good Statuses
1. If the 2012 Theory started We would just get kayne west to interupt it.
2. The guy who discovered Milk… What was he doing to the cow?
October 30th, 2010 at 2:19 am
“don’t mistake activity for achievement.”
November 18th, 2010 at 3:43 pm
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November 24th, 2010 at 2:16 am
Its hard to forget when we love a person without any reason…
November 24th, 2010 at 9:30 pm
Life is short to worry, Forget those who make you worry.
November 25th, 2010 at 7:52 pm
My time is precious, so if your out of yours don’t waste mine!
November 25th, 2010 at 7:56 pm
My business has one stockholder and that’s me!! So stay out of it!!
December 5th, 2010 at 7:43 pm
Leeanne Enos roses are red violets are blue I’m in love but not with u u said u loved me but that wasn’t true well guess what mother f***er I PLAYED U TOO!!
December 13th, 2010 at 4:19 am
Don’t need a bed i’m still rocking it.
December 13th, 2010 at 4:21 am
Life is a beach,so i’m just playing in the sand.
December 14th, 2010 at 1:34 am
http://joshabercrombie.yolasite.com/ great quotes and sayings
December 15th, 2010 at 10:13 am
sathi…..
ekanta ko sahara…..
boojh bisoune choutaro….
December 18th, 2010 at 4:44 pm
black holes are where god divided by zero
December 26th, 2010 at 7:15 am
After regaining my energies through this time of trouble,I have realised what my real assets are.False relations do not exist for long although they provide u temporary happiness but the real ones make u the real stuff.
January 7th, 2011 at 1:34 pm
I wanted t kill the sexiest person alive…but suicide is a crime
January 13th, 2011 at 3:05 am
I think those comments are awesome but I need some really funny ones !!!! Any sugestions ??
January 13th, 2011 at 5:56 pm
THESE R ALL WONDERFULL
January 21st, 2011 at 12:49 am
I AInt Cheap.,I Make Him Pay Attention.
January 21st, 2011 at 5:57 pm
facebook is like jail, your always writing on the walls and if your bad you might get poked.
January 25th, 2011 at 9:06 pm
live life like theres no tomorrow <3
January 26th, 2011 at 11:41 am
Life goes bored without problems….and problems won’t exist without life..
January 27th, 2011 at 10:50 am
A painful moment comes when u get close with a person and one day the person suddenly try to avoid u and ur heart wants to go…….n talk to that person but u cann’t even do that………???
January 28th, 2011 at 2:03 pm
i gave her enough love i had but she gave me patience,happiness,toughness what not everything except the love she received
January 28th, 2011 at 4:38 pm
Awesum..
January 28th, 2011 at 8:50 pm
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January 31st, 2011 at 4:51 pm
[...] A light-hearted take on what would happen if Luke Skywalker, Han Solo and Obi Wan-Kenobi were on facebook and posting status updates… [...]
February 2nd, 2011 at 7:51 am
Not so cool………WORK HARDER
February 27th, 2011 at 4:48 am
always bear a smile not bcoz life is rsn 2 smile but ur smile is itself a rsn for others
March 18th, 2011 at 7:42 am
all the quotes are superb…if there more plz give the link to me…
April 11th, 2011 at 4:23 pm
fantastic quotes!!! liked a lott
April 15th, 2011 at 9:59 pm
[...] your property while you’re gone or it’s protected by security, you may want to add a Facebook status quote to let your friends know you’ll be on holiday. Here are fifty inspiring classic quotes on [...]
May 4th, 2011 at 4:25 pm
[...] Bin Laden managed to get in one final Facebook status before there was a knock at the [...]
May 5th, 2011 at 2:36 am
quite nice thoughts…!
May 26th, 2011 at 12:27 am
[...] all seen those embarrassing Facebook status updates which you just feel sorry for the person posting it. Whether it be their total lack of dignity or [...]
June 11th, 2011 at 5:20 pm
really awesome
July 8th, 2011 at 7:52 am
if you want me to fall for you , u have to give me something worth tripping over.<3
August 8th, 2011 at 1:54 am
Over time Friends become acquaintances, acquaintances come to be lost memories, and memories diminish into dust. What are we now?! Just A collection of lost events or a heap of earth? – Michael Lopez
August 30th, 2011 at 2:56 pm
[...] We now have a lot of comments on 50 Facebook Status Updates Quotes, where visitors have left their own favorite Facebook status. 50 will soon become 100. But why stop there. Feel free to add your own favourite Facebook status update. [...]
September 9th, 2011 at 9:53 pm
young. old. just words
September 9th, 2011 at 9:54 pm
age is a mind of matter. you don’t mind and it doesn’t matter.
September 9th, 2011 at 9:54 pm
young. old. just words.
September 9th, 2011 at 9:56 pm
when life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye!
September 9th, 2011 at 9:58 pm
push will get a person almost anywhere-except through a door marked “pull.”
September 9th, 2011 at 10:02 pm
if you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
October 21st, 2011 at 2:27 pm
“If I had a million dollars for every time someone posted something interesting on Facebook, I’d be broke as shit!”