Highena

A gorilla escapes from the zoo and after 3 weeks, the zoo keepers give up looking for him. Some time later, a man calls the zoo complaining of a gorilla in a tree in his back yard. The zoo keeper rushes right over. When he arrives, he has a net, a baseball bat, a shotgun, and a Dachshund.

The man asks what the items are for. He’s told, “I’m gonna climb the tree and hit the gorilla in the head with the baseball bat. When he falls out of the tree, you throw the net over him, and the Dachshund will go straight for his balls.” The man asks, “But what’s the shotgun for?”

The zoo keeper answers, “If I miss the gorilla and fall out of the tree, you shoot the Dachshund.”

Just in my inbox:

Subject: Your medicine is ready and waiting for you

Hello my friend!I am ready to kill myself and eat my dog, if medicine prices here
(http://repeatphrase.hk) are bad.Look, the site and call me 1-800 if its wrong..My
dog and I are still alive

It looks like Israel’s really in the shit now.

I’ve just been having a good browse over at Stargoss at their great collection of TV bloopers.

Here’s a little compilation with some of my favourites:

I’m just going to keep posting these scam emails. If it helps enlighten people to these scams it’s got to be a good thing.

LOTTO NL COMPANY
Gruderweg120 Amsterdam
Holland office
log into: www.lotto.nl
FROM: THE DESK OF THE MANAGING DIRECTOR
THE LOTT0 NL COMPANY: WINNING FINAL NOTIFICATION.CONGRATULATIONS!!!
We are please to announce you as one of the 10 lucky winners in the Lotto
NL draw held on the 24th Apr , 2007. All 10 winning addresses were randomly
selected from a batch of 50,000,000 international emails. Your email address
emerged alongside 9 others as a category 2 winner in this year’s Annual
Lotto nl Draw.Consequently, you have therefore been approved for a total pay
out of 1,000,000 Us Dollars (one million Dollars) only. In order to avoid
unnecessary delays and complications please remember to quote your reference
number and batch numbers:
1, ticket number 20711465897-6291
2, BATCH:427901527-Dg43
3, the file Ref number: 232/656/4509
4, lucky numbers8-16-18-23-31-45
5, lotto code number: FL09622Holland
there will be lots of cash for if we have the winning ticket!
http://www.lotto.nl
Please contact the Dr John peter as soon as possible to get your winning
ticket
————————————————————————
—-
Advocate Dr John Peters
Telephone number +31 -617-621-925
Fax: +31-847-535-585
Email: johnpeters11112@aim.com

For processing and remittance of your cash to a designated account of your
choice. Remember, all winnings must be claim not later than May 16th, 2007,
after this date, unclaimed funds will be returned to the International
Lotto, you should contact advocate Dr john peters about the claimant
procedures, send your fax and telephone to Advocate Dr John Peters, this
will enable his office to send the claims application form (A4) to you the
Beneficiary.
Congratulations once again, from all members of staff and thank you for
being part of our promotions
program.reply to — johnpeters11112@aim.com
Once again congratulations.
Sincerely,
Sophia Halendale
Promotions Manager
The Lotto Company
Holland & Europe.